The shift back to darkness looms ominously. Lyrics to a nostalgic song rattling in my head. Familiar faces flash behind my eyes without much precursor. Rage swells with little cause, save frustration and hurry. I feel the need to release this massive inconvenience.
Once I made time to clear my head. I actively brainwashed myself into believing to achieve. With constant occupation, I guess I am running on automatic. My automatic thought process is a little darker than I would like, still. None-the-less, there are no flashes of gore and disturbing images now. There is no obsession with the macabre, though an appreciation remains.
I feel the threat of a shift, but not a shift, per say. My response is to do as I have been doing. Dream big. Pour my passions into what I believe I deserve. Bury myself beneath comforting thoughts and thoughtful comforts..
Too much social interaction. Too much, do I lend my ear. Such love I have for these beings that cling to me. Shush and deal alone? Listen and drown in sorrow?
I want to be dependable and helpful. I do not want to be involved in the business of conflict I have neither created nor perpetuated. There is little time for others' responsibilities now that my own are so closely looked after. However, when I sense their pain, I want to comfort and inspire.
For once I know there is a balance to be found. I relish in this fact.
Life is to be more stable where we're going. I can hold on a little longer until then. (=